Well today did not go as we were praying for.
Peanuts mom was able to get the judge to let her have 60 more days to "get clean"
DFS was shocked that the judge granted it for her, and so were we. The judge even asked for her to take a drug test as she left because she did not act "clean" at the hearing.
All I can possibly think of is that the court told her that she had one year to get clean. To take her rights away from her today, she could appeal and say it has not been a year, maybe the judge knows she won't get clean and so what is 60 more days?
On the other hand, we walked away upset and so confused, we were sure that all was going our way and with dfs asking for her rights to be terminated that for sure the judge would grant that, even mom's lawyer asked if she could be released from this case today because mom has done nothing to get her kids back, she was also denied from the judge.
We could all sit and scratch our heads over this one and I have had a pretty rough day asking God what his plan really is. I have so many times thought I was heading in his direction and doing what he wanted me too only to be shocked by the outcome, I still am looking for the victory he promised us over 2 years ago. I like to think of myself as a patient person who has stood tall and leaned on him in good times and in bad, but today I find myself with no strength.
I have said earlier I know that our prayers don't bounce off the ceiling, but today I almost physically wanted to touch that bumpy stuff on the ceiling to see if it was made of rubber.
I have always said I refuse to be ordinary that's why I share with you my true feelings and what I feel now. I can sit here and tell you all the "right stuff" to say, we are waiting on the Lord, his timing is perfect, everything happens for a reason, but really right now, I am not strong!!
I am very weak at this very moment as I write this. Tonight we were practicing "first Christmas" and I really can tell you that I did not feel the spirit tonight. I felt very alone,very secluded,very invisible. I sang the words and I hit the right notes, but really I was just not feelin' it if you know what I mean.
We all gathered around the room to pray and I knew Lee was praying for the people who were going to fill those seats who needed to be touched by the spirit. But as I could not control the tears as they ran down my cheeks, I felt my husbands hand grasp my tighter, for he knew that I was crying and him being the only person who knew why, well him and God.
I'm not saying that I don't believe he has a plan. I'm being real and telling you that today, well it sucked and I'm reaching out to you to pray for strength for us, I ask that you pray that God will show himself in a mighty way to remind us that he hears our cry. To be reassured from him soon is just what we need. So would you come along side of us and pray please?, I know by writing this it is healing for me, this is what I do. I refuse to pretend that being a Christian is easy it's sometimes really hard, but I know the victory will be so sweet when it gets here and you will be there with us when we get there, but for now I need "strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord"
Let me finish with telling you what I can smile about, when we left that court room this afternoon that sweet little Peanut, well she came home with us and therefore I get another day with her for now :)
Thank you friends for walking this with us.

Well today is a big day, we will meet with many people in a court room to see what the future holds for little Peanut. Please pray for us and everyone involved, we know God hears every pray, none of them bounce off the ceiling, they all go straight to him.
Have already spent alot of this morning just holding her, we let Mason stay home from school, so we really are just spending time together today as a family. I will post later the out come.
Thank you for all your prayers :)
The McCain's

Miracles:
Do you believe in them??
If you would have asked me that before I was a believer, I would have told you no. I would have been more on, what goes around comes around kinda thinking.
It's so odd to even think that maybe I would not believe in miracles today, I know many don't, and I need to remember those who don't think there are any miracles. I can easily be stuck in my own world, focusing on my own miracles waiting to happen. But the point to be here on this earth is to get others to believe in miracles too, right? To come along side of them and show them God's love, to walk life together, and help point out the miracles in their own lives, to teach them how to do the same.
God is performing miracles everyday, did you stop and see one today?, or were you so busy in your day that you missed it? Did you hear about that wreck that was on the highway, it happened 5 minutes after you passed?, did you see that deer run in front of you just in time for you to hit the breaks? You think that was by accident? ,it was not my friends, every moment of every hour God is in control, let me say that again, just in-case you were somewhere else when you skimmed past those words, Every moment of every hour, God is in control!!
Today a friend spoke on the gifts that the 3 wise men brought before Jesus after he was born, one of the gifts that they brought really caught my attention, it was Muhr, this item is what they would wrap the dead in so they bodies would not smell as they decayed. Friends, these wise men along with Mary already knew what Jesus was sent here for? He was sent here to die for ours sins, to wash them white as snow, white, not off white or tan-nish, but WHITE, so that thing that you asked forgiveness for 3 years ago, that the devil keeps bringing up, yep well God is saying to you "what are you talking about, I don't remember that? He already washed it away, he does not bring it back up after you have asked forgiveness for it. Now that is a miracle.
As you go about the rest of you day, look for those little miracles, then after seeing them, thank God for them, it blesses his heart to know that you noticed him today and gave him thanks for all that we have.

Well first day away from fb, but I did my quiet time first this morning, along with working out, funny that the word I was reading today was about taking care of your body. It fit well.
Peanut, Mason and I along with my folks went to see "Christmas in the Park" last night at the long view farm. Peanut sat in my mom's lap and just took in all the lights, while bubby read everything we passed, he is a awesome reader!!
We would ask Peanut, do you like the lights, and she would clap and sign, "more"
So cute, my mom ended the day by giving us advent calendars from Russell stovers, she gave us two, I said one for Mase and one for Peanut, but she knows who is eating the chocolate from Peanuts....."well, last year Mason would not share :(
Have a blessed wed.

I will be saying goodbye to the fb world tomorrow and will only be updating through our blog, next wed we go to court to ask the judge for mom's right's to be terminated, keep checking in to see this journey unfold.

"Strength will rise up as we wait upon the Lord, we will wait upon the Lord."

Ever thought about the words to this song? We had a guest this weekend at church who sang this song, and usually I just sing along to this one because it has good rhythm, but this week I found myself thinking about the words. Many times I find myself thinking about the words I am singing and it's hard to even sing, the Lord comes and touches my heart, like no one can. He fills me up with emotions, that I find myself wondering why he would love me so much, to have such grace on me as I walk this path called life. This path called life is not a easy one, and he did not promise it would be. But he did say that "he would never leave us or forsake us"
So what do these words mean, strength will rise up as we wait upon the Lord?
Well to me I know that for over 2 years we have been following God's plan to adopt and as I was telling a friend the other day, I remember praying for a bi-racial little girl to come into my home and let us love on her. This is the first prayer I asked for 2 years ago. We have had boys and girls of all different kinds of races, but no bi-racial girl til this last one arrived.
We have been through some tough times the last 2 years, waiting on the Lord, but I pray that you all see that while we have been through all of this, we have been waiting on him, and we still are.
We do not have a answer from him, but while we wait upon him, we know that he reigns forever, and he is are hope and our strong deliver. I know he has a answer for us, and I know that I have been human at trying to figure out his plan, I really wrack my brain sometimes, trying to look back and see who, where and when God used us to get to the point of where we are now.
The date Feb 8, is a date I can not get out of my mind. It's a date that means so many things to me, the date Journie was born, the date that little Peanut was placed into foster care with the Paulsens, the date that our social worker said was the approx date to look for her to be up for adoption, cool huh?
So while you are on this journey with us, look back, where where you a year ago? What was God doing in your life at the time, where are you now? What is is asking you to do?
Follow his plan, because at the end of the song, we will have more strength to praise him, because we sat in his presence and waiting for him to lay out the plan for our lives, you know.... the plan he has for us, not to harm us but to give us hope and a future :)
Love you all, have a great Tuesday !!

So, here is a update about our life.
We had a visit today from our social worker, she thought that we needed to have "Peanut" a least 8 months to be considered to be her adoptive parents, but after a phone call to dfs it's only 6 months.
She will have been here 6 months on Dec 16 2010. The next court date is Dec 8th, 2010 at 3:30 pm, please put this in your calendar to pray for us that day. Usually on this date, her mom is suppose to come in and say what she has been doing and ask for a extension on her rights, but because her mom has done nothing, they are asking for her rights to be terminated, could be a hard day.
So last week Jamie asked "what are we going to name her?" I said "I don't know?"
Jamie got up and went to the computer where he started looking at all these names, most of them start with a M, we still like Marley, but every time we say that name, that sweet baby that we did not get to adopt pops in our minds, kinda like it still is her name to this date, or at least to us.
It's funny to us, that we have had her for 5 months and not even had a conversation about what her name may be, it's just to hard to give her one, knowing it may be taken away from us.
I can rest assure you that I have taken it to the Lord, and I have prayed that all along he has known her name and would he please let us know what it is?
It's been fun, saying a name,looking at her and wondering if that is her name, God has given her.
by the way we are open to suggestions for a name, her middle name will be Claire, if God see's that she is to stay here with us.We like names that start with a M or a C, we also DO NOT like normal names, no maddison,or makenzie like names.It's so hard to pick names when you worked with kids for 18 years,I loved Samuel before we got Mason, but 2 weeks before we met Mason I had a Samuel, NO!!!! He was a wild man to say the least.
So what is in a name? We live with it for the rest of our lives, we write it down over and over for years and years to come. We don't usually have a choice in it, our parents give it to us, and only in hollywood have I heard of people changing theirs.
In conclusion, whatever her name is, God has already had it engraved in his heart and forever it will stay there, forever she will be his, forever he will be the same :)
Love you all,
S