My thoughts, my mind, His Word
We have been having a lot of meeting the last week about Peanut and her adoption coming up, this sets my mind a whirl. They come and tell us that Peanut's brother's father wants to adopt her too. They told us that because he has the boys , who are her half brothers (share the same mom) that he too will have preference because he is family, even though he is not even related to her. Put's a question mark in my mind for why, but I can't change that, it's the dfs system.
So the adoption specialist is here yesterday for over an hour telling us what will take place over the next 6 months.
They have to do a home study on this man , let's call him "Tim" . Homestudies take 3 month to do through dfs, but...... because Tim does not have a job or car and he lives at home with his mom and his boys he may not even qualify to get a home study done. This would be good for us, meaning they would set up a staffing and the only family in that staffing would be "US"
The earliest they can do a staffing if Tim is not involved is late September,after the staffing court usually moves quickly after that for a FINAL adoption. When I asked how fast, she said she did not know. We have never been worried about timing, lots of other people who are adopting have to wait while their child is in another foster home, and sometimes in another country. We are so blessed to have kept little "nutter butter" in our home, and to God all the glory for letting us have her while we are waiting.
If Tim meets the qualifications to have a home study, it will be 3 more months before they can even set up a staffing which could mean all this lasting until December or even into next year. This sets my mind racing, what if, what if, what if????
I have no idea how anyone with no faith could get through this, I know why other couples chose an adoption over seas, it may take a while, but none of this, but let me assure you, that this is the path Christ has set before us, we will praise him in this storm and give him thanks, for we know everything works out for his good.
I'm now going to let my human brain talk to you for a moment while I shed some tears and tell you, that I'm frustrated, my mind wonders all day and night when I can not sleep or focus on daily tasks, while if I'm not talking directly to God being right in front of his word reading it to get me through this, myself takes over and it breaks my heart to think of what could happen. The whole time I'm writing this tears stream down my cheeks as Peanut notices them, she brings me every toy in her toy box and says "there". The dogs are even in my lap and as I sniffle they look up at me with worry. So sweet that the Lord comforts me even in this time, monster trucks and baby dolls that are being given and these dogs who could not get any closer to me if they wanted to, I did not tell you that one of these dogs is my parents 80lb dog and she too is laying right beside me.Kinda sweet huh?
Ok, so I have gathered myself back together to tell you what HE has given me.
Yesterday he told me to get out of bed with awareness of his presence, that to give him the "what if such and such happens, can I handle it?", remember this is before our meeting.
He said the question is not if I can handle it but, to tell me that anything that occurs, I can handle with him, because we are in this together.
Today I woke up with my mind running, the to do list, the what if's again and how or what would I do, but I heard HIM say whisper my name, Jesus. So I did, with apologizing for my morning breath,I whispered "Jesus" I immedialty felt like I needed to give Jesus all my senses he has given us. I started with my eyes, dear heavenly Father, thank you for my eye sight, thank you for allowing me to see this earth you have created, for people who say they have never "seen the light", that they do not know, because no one has told them, how do they look around and wonder, how did all this get here?
The next was my smell, yesterday the foster mom of Tina brought me flowers, the scent is intoxicating. The scent of mason's hair, Peanut right out of the bath,coffee beans and I also love the smell of nature, the rain before it comes, lilacs are my favorite scent. When I walk by a lilac bush or tress, I want to just sit and let the breeze come as I can not get enough of that scent.
I go to my mouth, for I use to tasting and...... I like to eat, so all those fabulous foods we have, come on what's you favorite foods?, I can not narrate mine down to one,it depends on the day,sometimes it's a grilled hamburger with corn of the cob and fresh cold watermelon. Also a warm peach cobbler, the cobbler is warm so the ice cream melts just a little making it a little running, but no so soggy that it's a liquid. I know your hungry now, me too :)
I went from the taste to not a sense, but something I'm so thankful for, my voice. I use this for my opinion, I use this to speak on behalf of these motherless and fatherless children, but what I use it for that brings glory to my God, is praising his name in song. Anytime I ever need to be moved and feel the holy spirit I sing, I will go to you-tube, type in my favorite praise songs, stand wherever I may be and lift up our heavenly Father.
I also thanked him for my organs which allow me to live, my heart for letting it beat and thanking him for living inside of it.
When Mason first accepted Christ, he thought Jesus was really living in there, physically. He said "momma, how does Jesus fit in there?", my response, "he just does Mason, he's magical".
I thanked him for my sense of touch, that I could feel the kisses from my kids, and the warmth of my husbands arms while embracing in one of our many hugs we have a day, we are big huggers in our family. If you ever meet my grandma, she does not care who you are, if you walked in the door with one of us, your going to get a hug. Love that about her.
And the last on my list was my feet, I thanked him for leading my path, for putting my feet allows on solid ground, no matter how many times I fall and get brusied or cuts and scraps, lots of them I have perment scars for. I could not stop thinking about feet. The Lord gave me a vision of sitting at his feet, praising his name, I could not look up he was too bright to see. I knew I was at his feet. A bit if white cloth barley covered his toes, and gold rope was also dragging the floor, but what I was doing will never leave my mind, I was washing his feet with perfumed oil.
Luke 7:38 is now what is in my mind
"and as she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them"
Loved ones, at the end of this story Jesus forgives her of her sins, he tells her, "your faith is what has saved you, go in peace"
I am today believing this word, my faith is going to save me and for the rest of this day, I too will go in Peace.
Have a blessed day
Shelley
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Today in my quiet time, God said to do stuff today without looking at a clock, or the time frame to get things done.
I did all day except for the time I needed to get home so Jamie could go personal train someone (he had the kids, while I was away at a funeral.)
Something at the funeral of my Great Uncle Kenny was spoken today, that I really liked and would like to share it with you.
It's a story about a older man.
The older man knew that his time was soon coming that his life here on earth would soon be gone and his life in Heaven with Jesus would soon be here. He contacted a local funeral home and told the man he wanted to start planning the funeral, the man of course was puzzled that before he was dead was planning this, but of course he agreed.
The man picked out his favorite songs to be played along with the color of his casket and his favorite suit that he should wear. As they were finishing up, he said. "Oh yes and place a fork in my hand when you prepare my body and even bury me with it"
The funeral home man made a awkward face and asked the old man, "sir can I ask you why you would like the fork placed in your hand?"
The old man nodded with a grin on his face, he said well I always remember going out to eat as a young child and at the time when the waitress came to take my plate , she always said. "Keep your fork."
I knew that when she said keep your fork that she meant something better was to come, that maybe a nice slice of deep dish apple pie was coming, or maybe a large piece of red velvet cake. Whatever it was it was always something I looked forward to.
So when people walk passed my casket and ask "why is he holding a fork?" just tell them, the best is yet to come.
Maybe Heaven does or does not have red velvet cake or deep dish apple pie, my thought is of course they do and it's calorie free.
I do know , that this world does keep time, sometimes things like babies growing too fast or vacation being over too soon, we think "time goes flies by"
Other, in times of loosing a loved one, or having your house taken by tornado can seem time is standing still.
In all of this God's timing is always perfect, he already has it all planned out, but no matter what it is, whether time flying by, or standing still, I too am keeping my fork for the best is yet to come.
I did all day except for the time I needed to get home so Jamie could go personal train someone (he had the kids, while I was away at a funeral.)
Something at the funeral of my Great Uncle Kenny was spoken today, that I really liked and would like to share it with you.
It's a story about a older man.
The older man knew that his time was soon coming that his life here on earth would soon be gone and his life in Heaven with Jesus would soon be here. He contacted a local funeral home and told the man he wanted to start planning the funeral, the man of course was puzzled that before he was dead was planning this, but of course he agreed.
The man picked out his favorite songs to be played along with the color of his casket and his favorite suit that he should wear. As they were finishing up, he said. "Oh yes and place a fork in my hand when you prepare my body and even bury me with it"
The funeral home man made a awkward face and asked the old man, "sir can I ask you why you would like the fork placed in your hand?"
The old man nodded with a grin on his face, he said well I always remember going out to eat as a young child and at the time when the waitress came to take my plate , she always said. "Keep your fork."
I knew that when she said keep your fork that she meant something better was to come, that maybe a nice slice of deep dish apple pie was coming, or maybe a large piece of red velvet cake. Whatever it was it was always something I looked forward to.
So when people walk passed my casket and ask "why is he holding a fork?" just tell them, the best is yet to come.
Maybe Heaven does or does not have red velvet cake or deep dish apple pie, my thought is of course they do and it's calorie free.
I do know , that this world does keep time, sometimes things like babies growing too fast or vacation being over too soon, we think "time goes flies by"
Other, in times of loosing a loved one, or having your house taken by tornado can seem time is standing still.
In all of this God's timing is always perfect, he already has it all planned out, but no matter what it is, whether time flying by, or standing still, I too am keeping my fork for the best is yet to come.
Friday, May 20, 2011
I have two daily devotionals that I read every day, one was a gift from a friend and the other I picked up at a women of faith event.
Everyday I read them, its about a paragraph each and just gets my day started with God's word, some-days I just read them and ponder on what God is saying to me and other days, well it slaps me in the face.
Yesterday I was reading one and this is what it said.
"as the Heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts" Isaiah 55:8-9
I read it and thought, well yep I know that, opened the next devotional and read it, this is what it said......
the challenge for you today is to trust me and search for my way everyday, it also said that understanding my will and the future for my life is failure, We will ALWAYS fall short of God, only he knows the best for us, then ended with......."for my thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord.
"For as the Heavens are higher than the Earth, so my higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts"
So of course it caught my attention because two different books, that have nothing to do with one another, are saying the same verse on the same day, so I prayed about it asked God to use me as his vessel that day and to use the words he spoke to me in the day, well he didn't.
I was not upset I know Gods timing is always perfect and knew it would come someday.
Today was our meeting, its called a mediation meeting. The meeting is for us to decide and be asked if Peanut's mom can have any contact with her knowing that her rights are being taken away, you have to first know that the only time we have seen her Mother was in court, when she was mad and usually yelling the the court system and always defending herself.
So today, sitting at this table that was very small in a very small room, there was only Jamie and I, the mediator and her birth mom in the room, by conference call was the lawyer that speaks on Peanuts behalf and a supervisor also who was on by conference call.
I was not sure what to expect from mom, thought she would come in mad, but I just prayed the whole time as we sat waiting for her to come into the room, my prayer "Dear Heavenly Father, please give me the words and wisdom to speak, please Lord meet us here in this room , I give you my anxiety and worries right now, please let me be you right now, hide us behind your cross, let us love on this women as you do, break my heart Lord for what breaks yours, all of this for your Glory, Amen."
So we started the meeting with the 2 ladies on the phone telling the history of the Peanuts birth-mom , how she has done nothing that the courts have asked.
We said nothing, and mom was not angry, she seemed almost embarrassed.
Then we all began to talk about Peanuts future, the mediator asked her mom, what she wanted for her daughter, she said she wanted nothing but the best for her daughter, and she knows that she does not want her to have the life that she has had. She was afraid that if she had her in her care now, that the cycle would repeat itself and that she would never want that for her daughter. She told everyone in the room that she was thankful for Jamie and I, that she had nothing against us, she said she knows there is bad foster parents out there that do not care about the foster kids, and she can tell that we love her daughter.
Her birth mom asked us what we would say about her if she decided to let us adopt her, what would we say about her mom when she got older and asked , we told her that we would tell her that her mom her mom loved her so much that she did the best thing for her child and gave her up for adoption, knowing that we could give her a better life.
Tears began to roll down her cheeks and then mine as my heart broke for her, she was realizing this was the better choice, God was letting me feel what she was feeling, at first it was failure as a mother and now it was courage to do the right thing.
She said I don't know this family well, only seen them at the court hearings, but I can tell they will take care of her, then she looked deep into my eyes and asked, "please you won't let anything bad happen to her, will you?"
I told her that we already loved her as our own and I would protect her as best as I could.
The mediator at that time, asked her mom "are you saying that you would like to let them adopt her?" She began to cry and said "yes"
So of course I began to cry and then the mediator began to cry, she told us she was breaking all the rules letting herself cry too, birth mom had to excuse herself from the room for a moment to compose herself, Jamie and I just sat in the room in silence except for a few sniffles for the tears that would not stop coming.
This lady who for 16 months who has fought the system the whole way, is now willing to let us adopt her daughter, only God, only God!!!!
We all came back into the room the mediator asked how we could keep in contact, we said we would send photos and letters to her address. Mom agreed to that also.
We started to end the meeting and the mediator asked if we all had anything in closing to say, Jamie just looked at the birth mom and said thank you, I dug in my purse after the Lord told me to give her a photo of Peanut. I handed it to her, told her to keep this picture as encouragement to get clean, maybe the photo could be her inspiration.
She starred at it for a long time while crying.
I told her that I was proud of the choice she was making and that she was courageous, not a failure for making the choice she did today.
She looked at the mediator and said, if it's ok with the foster mom and you , can I hug her?
She replied yes and I almost ran to her with my arms open, just as Jesus would have, we hugged so tight as we both sobbed, for one mother letting go of her daughter and the other embracing her.
As we hugged I told her to focus on today, for tomorrow has enough troubles of it's own.
She said thank you, then as we we finished the hug, she said" you promise to take care of her?" I said "I promise"
God's ways are better than ours, his thoughts are better than our own.
I think sometimes God only gives us a glimpse of what he sees because, we could not handle this kind of grace all the time, we are human. He wants us to come to him in all circumstances, and not just the big stuff, but little too.
Won't you give God your "stuff?" he wants to mold into a beautiful tapestry."he promises' ;)"
Love you all,
Shelley
Everyday I read them, its about a paragraph each and just gets my day started with God's word, some-days I just read them and ponder on what God is saying to me and other days, well it slaps me in the face.
Yesterday I was reading one and this is what it said.
"as the Heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts" Isaiah 55:8-9
I read it and thought, well yep I know that, opened the next devotional and read it, this is what it said......
the challenge for you today is to trust me and search for my way everyday, it also said that understanding my will and the future for my life is failure, We will ALWAYS fall short of God, only he knows the best for us, then ended with......."for my thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord.
"For as the Heavens are higher than the Earth, so my higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts"
So of course it caught my attention because two different books, that have nothing to do with one another, are saying the same verse on the same day, so I prayed about it asked God to use me as his vessel that day and to use the words he spoke to me in the day, well he didn't.
I was not upset I know Gods timing is always perfect and knew it would come someday.
Today was our meeting, its called a mediation meeting. The meeting is for us to decide and be asked if Peanut's mom can have any contact with her knowing that her rights are being taken away, you have to first know that the only time we have seen her Mother was in court, when she was mad and usually yelling the the court system and always defending herself.
So today, sitting at this table that was very small in a very small room, there was only Jamie and I, the mediator and her birth mom in the room, by conference call was the lawyer that speaks on Peanuts behalf and a supervisor also who was on by conference call.
I was not sure what to expect from mom, thought she would come in mad, but I just prayed the whole time as we sat waiting for her to come into the room, my prayer "Dear Heavenly Father, please give me the words and wisdom to speak, please Lord meet us here in this room , I give you my anxiety and worries right now, please let me be you right now, hide us behind your cross, let us love on this women as you do, break my heart Lord for what breaks yours, all of this for your Glory, Amen."
So we started the meeting with the 2 ladies on the phone telling the history of the Peanuts birth-mom , how she has done nothing that the courts have asked.
We said nothing, and mom was not angry, she seemed almost embarrassed.
Then we all began to talk about Peanuts future, the mediator asked her mom, what she wanted for her daughter, she said she wanted nothing but the best for her daughter, and she knows that she does not want her to have the life that she has had. She was afraid that if she had her in her care now, that the cycle would repeat itself and that she would never want that for her daughter. She told everyone in the room that she was thankful for Jamie and I, that she had nothing against us, she said she knows there is bad foster parents out there that do not care about the foster kids, and she can tell that we love her daughter.
Her birth mom asked us what we would say about her if she decided to let us adopt her, what would we say about her mom when she got older and asked , we told her that we would tell her that her mom her mom loved her so much that she did the best thing for her child and gave her up for adoption, knowing that we could give her a better life.
Tears began to roll down her cheeks and then mine as my heart broke for her, she was realizing this was the better choice, God was letting me feel what she was feeling, at first it was failure as a mother and now it was courage to do the right thing.
She said I don't know this family well, only seen them at the court hearings, but I can tell they will take care of her, then she looked deep into my eyes and asked, "please you won't let anything bad happen to her, will you?"
I told her that we already loved her as our own and I would protect her as best as I could.
The mediator at that time, asked her mom "are you saying that you would like to let them adopt her?" She began to cry and said "yes"
So of course I began to cry and then the mediator began to cry, she told us she was breaking all the rules letting herself cry too, birth mom had to excuse herself from the room for a moment to compose herself, Jamie and I just sat in the room in silence except for a few sniffles for the tears that would not stop coming.
This lady who for 16 months who has fought the system the whole way, is now willing to let us adopt her daughter, only God, only God!!!!
We all came back into the room the mediator asked how we could keep in contact, we said we would send photos and letters to her address. Mom agreed to that also.
We started to end the meeting and the mediator asked if we all had anything in closing to say, Jamie just looked at the birth mom and said thank you, I dug in my purse after the Lord told me to give her a photo of Peanut. I handed it to her, told her to keep this picture as encouragement to get clean, maybe the photo could be her inspiration.
She starred at it for a long time while crying.
I told her that I was proud of the choice she was making and that she was courageous, not a failure for making the choice she did today.
She looked at the mediator and said, if it's ok with the foster mom and you , can I hug her?
She replied yes and I almost ran to her with my arms open, just as Jesus would have, we hugged so tight as we both sobbed, for one mother letting go of her daughter and the other embracing her.
As we hugged I told her to focus on today, for tomorrow has enough troubles of it's own.
She said thank you, then as we we finished the hug, she said" you promise to take care of her?" I said "I promise"
God's ways are better than ours, his thoughts are better than our own.
I think sometimes God only gives us a glimpse of what he sees because, we could not handle this kind of grace all the time, we are human. He wants us to come to him in all circumstances, and not just the big stuff, but little too.
Won't you give God your "stuff?" he wants to mold into a beautiful tapestry."he promises' ;)"
Love you all,
Shelley
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Ok, so this is not about adoption, but I guess if you are adopting you really have to pinch your pennies to do so, right?
This is my walgreens deal today.
I got
2 tylenol precise creams, $7.99 each = $15.98
2 lady speed stick deodorants, $2.39 each=$4.78
1 box 36 ct tampons,$7.99
total of =$28.75
I had 2 coupons from the Tylenol website for $5 off any one Tylenol precise product
then.....in the walgreens coupons there was a $3 off coupon.
So I took 2 coupons books from walgreens, and used 2 coupons on one item,and 2 on the other making them FREE!
Then lady speed stick at Walgreen was buy one get one FREE, so I had 50 cent of coupons from the manufacture (which I have 2 of also), well since I'm buying 2 deodorants, they let me use both coupons, so I got $1.00 off one and the other one FREE, making my total so far $3.78 for all....then....
I got a 36 ct box of kotex tampons, I had a $3 off manufacturer coupon and walgreens has a $3 off coupon in their book, so that takes those from $7.99 to $1.99.
My total with out tax $5.78 :)
Just a fun way to save some money,
and of course like always with anything in my life, PRAISE JESUS!!
This is my walgreens deal today.
I got
2 tylenol precise creams, $7.99 each = $15.98
2 lady speed stick deodorants, $2.39 each=$4.78
1 box 36 ct tampons,$7.99
total of =$28.75
I had 2 coupons from the Tylenol website for $5 off any one Tylenol precise product
then.....in the walgreens coupons there was a $3 off coupon.
So I took 2 coupons books from walgreens, and used 2 coupons on one item,and 2 on the other making them FREE!
Then lady speed stick at Walgreen was buy one get one FREE, so I had 50 cent of coupons from the manufacture (which I have 2 of also), well since I'm buying 2 deodorants, they let me use both coupons, so I got $1.00 off one and the other one FREE, making my total so far $3.78 for all....then....
I got a 36 ct box of kotex tampons, I had a $3 off manufacturer coupon and walgreens has a $3 off coupon in their book, so that takes those from $7.99 to $1.99.
My total with out tax $5.78 :)
Just a fun way to save some money,
and of course like always with anything in my life, PRAISE JESUS!!
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Well it's Sunday night and things are still going strong here in the McCain household.
It's usually 8 when Peanut goes to bed, then 9 when Mason goes to bed, so we are still wrapping the evening up, but I knew if I did not blog now, you all would be waiting another day.
So I decided that right now is the time.
God spoke boldly this am, and that's when I like to sit down and blog, because it's fresh in my mind as well as my heart, but I was on time for church and I was afraid if I sat down and I would be late.
I hate being late anywhere, but I really hate being late for church, worship is one of my favorite times, I feel like it allows me to breath, accept his presence and then prepare myself for what he has to say.
Lots of you have asked about us moving, so here is the status on that....
We have felt for awhile now that God is asking us to move, we are not sure where or when but he has asked us, we really are not sure if God is asking us to do this and then we will still stay right here on Sweet Gum, but he is asking us to be obedient, and that is what we will be.
Our minds are thinking that maybe we will be moving to either, Blue Springs Mo (North side, Go Wildcats!!) or to Arlington Texas where Jamie has a job interview in July.
I know, I know, that's two WAY different places. So what we feel we need to do is put our house up for sale by owner for now, if someone buys it we will go from there.
God's word tells us to not to worry about tomorrow, for there is enough to focus on for today alone. It was affirmation today at church, for this is a verse was spoken by our pastor, today he spoke about being anxious and worrying. So please be praying for the purchase of our home, we are praying that the perfect family comes along and buys it.
We built this home and has lots of memories in it. From bringing Mason to it with nothing but cows in the backyard, then to becoming foster parents and caring for over 14 babies here. I rocked a lot of babies to sleep in that back bedroom and even said goodbye to one, who now lives with our heavenly Father.
I'm not looking back with sadness, but looking back with joy.
I'm looking forward for what the Lord has planned for us, for sure we are praying," Lord Order My Steps In Your Word!!!"
I read a devotion daily, and I love reading it then cross references it with the bible.
I love, love, love it, when I open the devotion or his word and God smacks me in the face with what he wants to tell me. Today in my devotion he told me this.
"You are in the path of My choosing. There is no randomness in your life. Here and now comprise the coordinates of you life. Most people let their moments slip through their fingers, half lived. They avoid the present while worrying about the future or longing for a better time and a better place.They forget that they are creatures who are subjects to the limitations of time and space. They forget their Creator, who walks with them only in the present.
Every moment is alive with my Glorious Presence to those who hearts are intimately connected with mine.
As you give yourself more and more to a life of constant communion of Me, you will simply have no to time for worry. Thus you are freed to let my spirit direct your steps (yes, order my steps!!)
this will enable you to walk along the path of Peace."
This all comes from Luke 12:25-26 & Luke 1:79
I read that, then I read it again, out loud, and with thankfulness that filled my heart. I then began to sing, order my steps in your word!! While Satan is busy God is REAL, order my steps in your word. This means Satan is busy trying to find his way in, by giving us negative thoughts about what we are doing, some people have even talked down to us about moving, or questioned us why, guess what?
I'm gunna let what you just said fly, let it roll off, when God has asked you to do something and you are doing it, you NEVER have to defend yourself, NEVER. I do not say any of this out of anger, don't try to ask yourself "did I say something?" It's not you, it's Satan and we have in the name of Jesus rebuked him from this situation. We ask many of you for your prayers, not your opinions and then we can watch God work.
I can't wait to see what he has planned and as hard as it is with my human brain trying to see where he is piecing it together, I will choose to focus on today and today only
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34
Love you all
Shelley
ps as I finish this I got a call from the foster parents we are doing respite care for next week.
They will be here friday and we will have both of them for one week. Ezekiel is 1 and Tina is 4 months, Tina was admitted to children's mercy tonight with a yucky cough, she is only 6 lbs at her age of 4 moths, she was born at 23 weeks, she is a miracle baby, please pray for her to get well, I can't wait to sing, pray and love on them while they are here :)
It's usually 8 when Peanut goes to bed, then 9 when Mason goes to bed, so we are still wrapping the evening up, but I knew if I did not blog now, you all would be waiting another day.
So I decided that right now is the time.
God spoke boldly this am, and that's when I like to sit down and blog, because it's fresh in my mind as well as my heart, but I was on time for church and I was afraid if I sat down and I would be late.
I hate being late anywhere, but I really hate being late for church, worship is one of my favorite times, I feel like it allows me to breath, accept his presence and then prepare myself for what he has to say.
Lots of you have asked about us moving, so here is the status on that....
We have felt for awhile now that God is asking us to move, we are not sure where or when but he has asked us, we really are not sure if God is asking us to do this and then we will still stay right here on Sweet Gum, but he is asking us to be obedient, and that is what we will be.
Our minds are thinking that maybe we will be moving to either, Blue Springs Mo (North side, Go Wildcats!!) or to Arlington Texas where Jamie has a job interview in July.
I know, I know, that's two WAY different places. So what we feel we need to do is put our house up for sale by owner for now, if someone buys it we will go from there.
God's word tells us to not to worry about tomorrow, for there is enough to focus on for today alone. It was affirmation today at church, for this is a verse was spoken by our pastor, today he spoke about being anxious and worrying. So please be praying for the purchase of our home, we are praying that the perfect family comes along and buys it.
We built this home and has lots of memories in it. From bringing Mason to it with nothing but cows in the backyard, then to becoming foster parents and caring for over 14 babies here. I rocked a lot of babies to sleep in that back bedroom and even said goodbye to one, who now lives with our heavenly Father.
I'm not looking back with sadness, but looking back with joy.
I'm looking forward for what the Lord has planned for us, for sure we are praying," Lord Order My Steps In Your Word!!!"
I read a devotion daily, and I love reading it then cross references it with the bible.
I love, love, love it, when I open the devotion or his word and God smacks me in the face with what he wants to tell me. Today in my devotion he told me this.
"You are in the path of My choosing. There is no randomness in your life. Here and now comprise the coordinates of you life. Most people let their moments slip through their fingers, half lived. They avoid the present while worrying about the future or longing for a better time and a better place.They forget that they are creatures who are subjects to the limitations of time and space. They forget their Creator, who walks with them only in the present.
Every moment is alive with my Glorious Presence to those who hearts are intimately connected with mine.
As you give yourself more and more to a life of constant communion of Me, you will simply have no to time for worry. Thus you are freed to let my spirit direct your steps (yes, order my steps!!)
this will enable you to walk along the path of Peace."
This all comes from Luke 12:25-26 & Luke 1:79
I read that, then I read it again, out loud, and with thankfulness that filled my heart. I then began to sing, order my steps in your word!! While Satan is busy God is REAL, order my steps in your word. This means Satan is busy trying to find his way in, by giving us negative thoughts about what we are doing, some people have even talked down to us about moving, or questioned us why, guess what?
I'm gunna let what you just said fly, let it roll off, when God has asked you to do something and you are doing it, you NEVER have to defend yourself, NEVER. I do not say any of this out of anger, don't try to ask yourself "did I say something?" It's not you, it's Satan and we have in the name of Jesus rebuked him from this situation. We ask many of you for your prayers, not your opinions and then we can watch God work.
I can't wait to see what he has planned and as hard as it is with my human brain trying to see where he is piecing it together, I will choose to focus on today and today only
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34
Love you all
Shelley
ps as I finish this I got a call from the foster parents we are doing respite care for next week.
They will be here friday and we will have both of them for one week. Ezekiel is 1 and Tina is 4 months, Tina was admitted to children's mercy tonight with a yucky cough, she is only 6 lbs at her age of 4 moths, she was born at 23 weeks, she is a miracle baby, please pray for her to get well, I can't wait to sing, pray and love on them while they are here :)
Friday, April 15, 2011
Ok, so if you are female you will be able to keep up with this post.
Have you ever had a friend that you can talk about 15 subjects all in about 15 minutes? I have a few of those, but one comes to my mind when I think of that, my friend Shauna, we have been friends since 1st grade. As long as I can remember we have always been that way, people around us would ask "what are you talking about now?"
We always kept right up with one another without ever skipping a beat.
Well this post may be a little like that, cuz I want to touch on a few ongoing and upcoming things.
Since this blog is to follow our journey to adoption, here is the update on Peanut.
We have left a message with her adoption worker, because we have heard nothing, and have heard nothing back. If I sit and ponder about the situation I get mad, but it's in God's timing and we need to be still and know he is God.
I made an arrangement for her to see her half brother's the other day, we went to kaleidoscope, they had never been there before, her brother's are 4 and 7.
The youngest one played with Peanut some, but the older one investigated the whole kaleidoscope (think he liked it a lot!)
When we were ending the day I asked their dad (which Peanut shares the same mom with these boys, not dad)I asked him if he heard anything or knew of any changes, he said no, he knew mom had to go back to court the end of July and that was all he knew. Mom is not suppose to have any contact with them at all, but after Jamie asked a question to one of the boys about sharing his candy with dad, he said no mommy takes my candy. So we think she is still seeing them.
He was asked if he wanted to also try for adopting Peanut and he said, yes, just so they kids could all stay together and that she would have older brothers, which we all know she already has an older brother who is the BEST!!
Dad is unemployed and has no car or transportation, so we are not really worried that they will choose him, I really have peace about this, but it's the state and you never know.
So this is the update on her, not much but something for you to pray for.
The other is healing, we as a family are healing in a few matters, I learned a lot yesterday during prayer time in Matthew 7, this talks about you seeing the speck in someone's eye, when you have a plank in yours. Ouch!!
Be slow to judge, and do you know how hard that is? I know one sin is not worse than another, but friends, we do it all the time. We look at someone and because of the way they dress or smell, the car they drive or the house they live in, the clothes they wear or the money they have or do not have, we judge them, this is wrong and God does not intend on us to look upon one another this way. He wants us to see others the way he see's them,kinda hard to do sometimes, but I sure have felt that I have done this, even with people walking down the street. So my prayer is that I see the good in everyone that crosses my path, it will take some prayers and conviction, but I'm going to work on it.
Have you ever forgave someone and felt that freedom?, it is GREAT, so we are feeling the holy spirit move and have a road to go still, it's getting closer, believe it's coming :)
And last is......
I have been unemployed now for a few weeks, I applied for unemployment and they sent me a letter saying it was granted, it's not much, but I can sure stretch a penny these days with my coupons ;)
Well this week I got a letter in the mail saying that there was an "issue" that arouse and I would have to be on a phone call today to discuss the matter, then it would take 3-6 weeks for them to decide if I would still be considered. So I was a little worried about that this week.
This A.M., I knew that God was calling me to come sit in his presence and be still in his word.
I saw a post in FB to read Psalms 91:1, so I read it, got engaged by it and began to read the whole Psalm 91, it was great, it's about being safe under the wings of the most high God, that he is my refuge. Then I went on to read in my Jesus calling book, it was the same subject, it said to trust him, that many things today feel out of control and how I like things in order. When I feel these things take over, he will put me on a high rock and protect me. To take shelter under his wings, where I am secure. Say yes to the things in your life I lead you into and trust in me, do not be afraid.
Can I get an AMEN!
This message is for all of us, not just me. So if things feel out of whack, go sit and rest under his wings, look at it from upon a high rock, be still and hear his word.
So as I was waiting for the phone call this song came into my head.
"When the oceans rise and thunders roar, I will soar with you above the storm, Father you are King over the flood, I will be still and know you are God"
I clicked on youtube, clicked on the first song and just worshiped him.
As soon as the song was over my phone rang, it was the employment office,he asked a few questions about me working for the Jackson County School Dist, I said yes I worked for them, but I applied because I was laid off after a seasonal position I took with Thomas Nelson Live.
He said, "oh I see, so this is not that you are off for the summer and going to go back to work for the school district?" I said "no".
He said ok, well then all is well with your unemployment and you should receive your first check next week. "there is no waiting period, I said?"
"nope, he said it was a misunderstanding and all is good, I will take care of this problem in less than 2 minutes and you will be fine"
"I will be fine, I thought" of course I will, I'm under the wings of our most heavenly Father, he has me high on a rock.
I immidetaly hung up the phone, fell to my knees, thanking Jesus for being so good to me, I could not help the tears from coming, he said to me, "I had you this time daughter, and I will the next time too"
Gods word also tells us, that on days like today, when it seems, like a stay at home quiet day, when nothing seems to be happening. Instead of being bored by the lack of action, use these times to seek his face.
God bless-
Shelley
Have you ever had a friend that you can talk about 15 subjects all in about 15 minutes? I have a few of those, but one comes to my mind when I think of that, my friend Shauna, we have been friends since 1st grade. As long as I can remember we have always been that way, people around us would ask "what are you talking about now?"
We always kept right up with one another without ever skipping a beat.
Well this post may be a little like that, cuz I want to touch on a few ongoing and upcoming things.
Since this blog is to follow our journey to adoption, here is the update on Peanut.
We have left a message with her adoption worker, because we have heard nothing, and have heard nothing back. If I sit and ponder about the situation I get mad, but it's in God's timing and we need to be still and know he is God.
I made an arrangement for her to see her half brother's the other day, we went to kaleidoscope, they had never been there before, her brother's are 4 and 7.
The youngest one played with Peanut some, but the older one investigated the whole kaleidoscope (think he liked it a lot!)
When we were ending the day I asked their dad (which Peanut shares the same mom with these boys, not dad)I asked him if he heard anything or knew of any changes, he said no, he knew mom had to go back to court the end of July and that was all he knew. Mom is not suppose to have any contact with them at all, but after Jamie asked a question to one of the boys about sharing his candy with dad, he said no mommy takes my candy. So we think she is still seeing them.
He was asked if he wanted to also try for adopting Peanut and he said, yes, just so they kids could all stay together and that she would have older brothers, which we all know she already has an older brother who is the BEST!!
Dad is unemployed and has no car or transportation, so we are not really worried that they will choose him, I really have peace about this, but it's the state and you never know.
So this is the update on her, not much but something for you to pray for.
The other is healing, we as a family are healing in a few matters, I learned a lot yesterday during prayer time in Matthew 7, this talks about you seeing the speck in someone's eye, when you have a plank in yours. Ouch!!
Be slow to judge, and do you know how hard that is? I know one sin is not worse than another, but friends, we do it all the time. We look at someone and because of the way they dress or smell, the car they drive or the house they live in, the clothes they wear or the money they have or do not have, we judge them, this is wrong and God does not intend on us to look upon one another this way. He wants us to see others the way he see's them,kinda hard to do sometimes, but I sure have felt that I have done this, even with people walking down the street. So my prayer is that I see the good in everyone that crosses my path, it will take some prayers and conviction, but I'm going to work on it.
Have you ever forgave someone and felt that freedom?, it is GREAT, so we are feeling the holy spirit move and have a road to go still, it's getting closer, believe it's coming :)
And last is......
I have been unemployed now for a few weeks, I applied for unemployment and they sent me a letter saying it was granted, it's not much, but I can sure stretch a penny these days with my coupons ;)
Well this week I got a letter in the mail saying that there was an "issue" that arouse and I would have to be on a phone call today to discuss the matter, then it would take 3-6 weeks for them to decide if I would still be considered. So I was a little worried about that this week.
This A.M., I knew that God was calling me to come sit in his presence and be still in his word.
I saw a post in FB to read Psalms 91:1, so I read it, got engaged by it and began to read the whole Psalm 91, it was great, it's about being safe under the wings of the most high God, that he is my refuge. Then I went on to read in my Jesus calling book, it was the same subject, it said to trust him, that many things today feel out of control and how I like things in order. When I feel these things take over, he will put me on a high rock and protect me. To take shelter under his wings, where I am secure. Say yes to the things in your life I lead you into and trust in me, do not be afraid.
Can I get an AMEN!
This message is for all of us, not just me. So if things feel out of whack, go sit and rest under his wings, look at it from upon a high rock, be still and hear his word.
So as I was waiting for the phone call this song came into my head.
"When the oceans rise and thunders roar, I will soar with you above the storm, Father you are King over the flood, I will be still and know you are God"
I clicked on youtube, clicked on the first song and just worshiped him.
As soon as the song was over my phone rang, it was the employment office,he asked a few questions about me working for the Jackson County School Dist, I said yes I worked for them, but I applied because I was laid off after a seasonal position I took with Thomas Nelson Live.
He said, "oh I see, so this is not that you are off for the summer and going to go back to work for the school district?" I said "no".
He said ok, well then all is well with your unemployment and you should receive your first check next week. "there is no waiting period, I said?"
"nope, he said it was a misunderstanding and all is good, I will take care of this problem in less than 2 minutes and you will be fine"
"I will be fine, I thought" of course I will, I'm under the wings of our most heavenly Father, he has me high on a rock.
I immidetaly hung up the phone, fell to my knees, thanking Jesus for being so good to me, I could not help the tears from coming, he said to me, "I had you this time daughter, and I will the next time too"
Gods word also tells us, that on days like today, when it seems, like a stay at home quiet day, when nothing seems to be happening. Instead of being bored by the lack of action, use these times to seek his face.
God bless-
Shelley
Thursday, March 31, 2011
ok, so I would have to post over and over on fb to fill you all in.
So, I'm going to fill you in on my blog.
Today as many of you know is my last day with the revolve team, oh I how I loved doing this job, I felt so complete doing it, I never would have considered myself a sales person, but when you are passionate about what your selling, and in my case the opportunity to have teen girls learn about Jesus Christ, well what could be better than that? It was never about the ticket sales for me, it's only a number, but every time I went out to sell tickets, I prayed first that God would lead me to the right places to reach the girls who needed to be at the event. He is always so faithful and came through. At my event here in KC there was over 6 thousand teens in the arena, and over 1700 made a first time choice to trust Jesus Christ as there savior, PRAISE GOD!!!
So for a year now, Jamie has been looking for a new job, there is nothing wrong with the one he has now at Fox, he has been there 12 years and Fox has always been good to him. He has had his heart tugged on for over a year to look into the Police Academy. For a long time I blew him off, told him to stay at Fox, he was safe there and it paid the bills. He finally convinced me when he told me it was something God had laid on his heart and felt like he needed to pursue it as obedience. I know that sometimes God will ask us to do things just to see if we will do them, if we will follow through with what he asks, he may not really have that certain something even in his will, but he is just testing us. So, Jamie has applied for a few positions at Police Academies and even at different news stations outside the state of Mo. I was excited when he found a position that was open in Texas working with ESPN, this job is what he does here, but with sports, hello, that screams Jamie!! but, after filling out the application we heard nothing from them. but.....he has heard back from 2 police academy's the last 48 hours. Both who are interested in going the next step with him. There are many steps, testing and physical fitness test, background screening ect ect, at any time God can close the doors and say ok, you did well faithful servant, go back and work at Fox.
With me being out of a job as of tomorrow and Jamie searching, we just feel in our hearts that now is the perfect time for us to be completly open to our future, we both feel a stir taking place. I have been digging for answers from the Lord, we are following hard after him. Please believe me when I say that we want NOTHING but God's will. BUT, whatever that will is, the answer from us is YES, what would happen if we did this our way? we may miss the blessing and that to me is heartbreaking. God knows our hearts, he knows our desires, we will continue to seek him and follow him all the way to the finish line, like I have said many times before." With our arms raised in a V we shall cross that finish line in Victory !!"
Here is the reading I have read today, perfect for us today.
"God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble,
Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations. I will be exalted among the earth. Psalms 46: 1 & 10
"Taste and see that I Am good"Psalms 34 :8
“Then you will know which way to go,
since you have never been this way before.”
Joshua 3:4a (NIV)
Dear Lord, thank You for Your promised presence. It comforts my heart to know that I am not alone. Lead me, Lord, through the unknowns in my life. Make Your path clear and I will follow it. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
So I was getting ready to close out this post when KLOVE just called my house thanking us for being a listener, and wanted to let us know that today they would be praying 3 times in their chapel, wanted to know how they could pray for us? Cool huh? God's always on time, is he not?
Just then I got a text from Jamie's cousin saying she was praying for Peanuts adoption to be on the fast track. When I hung up the phone I looked up to the TV to see Marlee M, from the apprentice on the Nate Burkus show, hello her name is MARLEE...... ok so we have a different spelling, but not doubting God is right in front of my face today, this is what happens when you seek the father, he is there all the time, he is waiting for us to seek him so he can show off.
Praise Jesus!!
So, I'm going to fill you in on my blog.
Today as many of you know is my last day with the revolve team, oh I how I loved doing this job, I felt so complete doing it, I never would have considered myself a sales person, but when you are passionate about what your selling, and in my case the opportunity to have teen girls learn about Jesus Christ, well what could be better than that? It was never about the ticket sales for me, it's only a number, but every time I went out to sell tickets, I prayed first that God would lead me to the right places to reach the girls who needed to be at the event. He is always so faithful and came through. At my event here in KC there was over 6 thousand teens in the arena, and over 1700 made a first time choice to trust Jesus Christ as there savior, PRAISE GOD!!!
So for a year now, Jamie has been looking for a new job, there is nothing wrong with the one he has now at Fox, he has been there 12 years and Fox has always been good to him. He has had his heart tugged on for over a year to look into the Police Academy. For a long time I blew him off, told him to stay at Fox, he was safe there and it paid the bills. He finally convinced me when he told me it was something God had laid on his heart and felt like he needed to pursue it as obedience. I know that sometimes God will ask us to do things just to see if we will do them, if we will follow through with what he asks, he may not really have that certain something even in his will, but he is just testing us. So, Jamie has applied for a few positions at Police Academies and even at different news stations outside the state of Mo. I was excited when he found a position that was open in Texas working with ESPN, this job is what he does here, but with sports, hello, that screams Jamie!! but, after filling out the application we heard nothing from them. but.....he has heard back from 2 police academy's the last 48 hours. Both who are interested in going the next step with him. There are many steps, testing and physical fitness test, background screening ect ect, at any time God can close the doors and say ok, you did well faithful servant, go back and work at Fox.
With me being out of a job as of tomorrow and Jamie searching, we just feel in our hearts that now is the perfect time for us to be completly open to our future, we both feel a stir taking place. I have been digging for answers from the Lord, we are following hard after him. Please believe me when I say that we want NOTHING but God's will. BUT, whatever that will is, the answer from us is YES, what would happen if we did this our way? we may miss the blessing and that to me is heartbreaking. God knows our hearts, he knows our desires, we will continue to seek him and follow him all the way to the finish line, like I have said many times before." With our arms raised in a V we shall cross that finish line in Victory !!"
Here is the reading I have read today, perfect for us today.
"God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble,
Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations. I will be exalted among the earth. Psalms 46: 1 & 10
"Taste and see that I Am good"Psalms 34 :8
“Then you will know which way to go,
since you have never been this way before.”
Joshua 3:4a (NIV)
Dear Lord, thank You for Your promised presence. It comforts my heart to know that I am not alone. Lead me, Lord, through the unknowns in my life. Make Your path clear and I will follow it. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
So I was getting ready to close out this post when KLOVE just called my house thanking us for being a listener, and wanted to let us know that today they would be praying 3 times in their chapel, wanted to know how they could pray for us? Cool huh? God's always on time, is he not?
Just then I got a text from Jamie's cousin saying she was praying for Peanuts adoption to be on the fast track. When I hung up the phone I looked up to the TV to see Marlee M, from the apprentice on the Nate Burkus show, hello her name is MARLEE...... ok so we have a different spelling, but not doubting God is right in front of my face today, this is what happens when you seek the father, he is there all the time, he is waiting for us to seek him so he can show off.
Praise Jesus!!
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