I am writing this today, for tomorrow may be just too rough to do so. Come with me if you will on a Jouney to the last moments with Journie Unique Price. On this day last year Journie was fighting for each breath she took, she was so sweet with those chubby cheeks and her pink,pink toe nails. I remember having her on the first day and before her machine were all in place in my living room I was painting those sweet little toes, PINK:)
She never cried and as said as it is, really because she did not have strong enough lungs to do so,but she would just give me a look and I knew that she had enough suctioning or when she was uncomfortable I could feel her squirm. My favorite time with Journie is when I would bath her, I did this ever night weather she needed it or not, because it was what I loved the most to do with her, she was free from tubes and wires for a short time and I know she enjoyed that feeling too. Most of the time she was struggling to breath and we all did our best to always make sure she was as comfortable as we could make her, but she always would calm her breathing during her bath,it was so comforting to her and to me, she knew it was time and her eyes would get big and she would know, because we would start the move of all her equipment into the kitchen. First we would move the suction machine to the counter, then make sure all her supplies were in the right place, last we would move her and her oxygen to the kitchen, and her and I knew it was spa time:)
I got to take all her tubes off and all those sticky pads off her that sometimes left her skin red. I got to free her from these daily burdens for such a short time a day and it made me feel like I was taking the best care of her I could. When she was done with her bath I would lotion her and just snuggle her in her warm towel, yes warm, I would put a towel in the dryer before she had a bath and have Jamie or whoever was around go get it from the laundry room seconds before she got out so it would be warm for her, I told you it was spa time.
I did not know that the last bath I would give her was one year ago from today, although I felt the time was near, only God knew she was being prepared for him to bring her home. That last night with her was a sleepless one, the nurse came to wake me to tell me she was not doing well. I got up and just held her all night and into the morning hours. I called my mom once the sun was up and told her soon it was time. My mom came and cooked us breakfast and we just took turns holding her while the nurse gave her meds to make her comfortable. The weather outside was beautiful, and as much work as it was to get her out of the house, when we would take her to Masons' football games she always perked up, she loved being outside and seeing other people.
My mom suggested we move her outside to the warm sun, she we packed her up and moved outside. She immediately was comforted by the warmth. It was about 11 when I released the nurse to go home. Minutes after he left my mom was holding her and we saw a blue and black butterfly land on my deck, it was so peaceful and quite. My mom asked if I wanted her back and I said yes,mom went inside to get a drink and returned, as she was inside I told Journie that I was ok and that if she was just too tired to take another breath, I was ok to let Jesus have her. I then prayed to God, telling him that if it was her time to go that I was going to be ok and thanked him for letting me be in her life, it was not a minute later that her chest to mine, she left my arms to the arms of Jesus.
Mom and I shed some tears and all in a breath she was gone.
That day Jesus freed her from her tubes and machines forever. I'm thankful that I was a part of Journie's life,I'm thankful God chose me to have her the day she went to heaven. I'm not pretending that it's not hard, I have already shed some tears sharing this with you and tomorrow as I visit her grave I know I will shed some more. I'm sharing this with you because life is hard handle it with prayer.
Below is the blog I wrote after Journie passed away.
Love you all.
It has been to long since our last post, and because life has been happening, and not just ordinary things, but hard life.
We have been repite caring for a sweet baby girl, Journie. She was born at 25 weeks and life has just been hard on her, all of her energy goes just to taking her every single breath. She has had a journey herself, we have cared for her before but when she came into our care the second time, she was fighting the battle to just stay alive, on September 27th at 11:15am she lost her battle here on earth, Jesus gently took her from my arms and into his, it was the sweetest moment to know that he waited til we were outside on the deck her chest to mine where she took her last breath.
My earthly body does miss her and her sweet face and her hot pink toe nails, but God has been so gentle to hold me so close and give me peace, so when those tears fall they are falling because we serve such gentle savior. Journie Mays-Price 2/8/2009-9/27/2009
So glad she is resting peacefully safe in the arms of our Jesus! Very sweet post, I will be praying strength for you tomorrow! Journie was so lucky to have YOU to give her such good care and give her loving arms before Jesus took her home!
ReplyDeleteLove ya!