I have two daily devotionals that I read every day, one was a gift from a friend and the other I picked up at a women of faith event.
Everyday I read them, its about a paragraph each and just gets my day started with God's word, some-days I just read them and ponder on what God is saying to me and other days, well it slaps me in the face.

Yesterday I was reading one and this is what it said.
"as the Heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts" Isaiah 55:8-9
I read it and thought, well yep I know that, opened the next devotional and read it, this is what it said......
the challenge for you today is to trust me and search for my way everyday, it also said that understanding my will and the future for my life is failure, We will ALWAYS fall short of God, only he knows the best for us, then ended with......."for my thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord.
"For as the Heavens are higher than the Earth, so my higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts"
So of course it caught my attention because two different books, that have nothing to do with one another, are saying the same verse on the same day, so I prayed about it asked God to use me as his vessel that day and to use the words he spoke to me in the day, well he didn't.
I was not upset I know Gods timing is always perfect and knew it would come someday.

Today was our meeting, its called a mediation meeting. The meeting is for us to decide and be asked if Peanut's mom can have any contact with her knowing that her rights are being taken away, you have to first know that the only time we have seen her Mother was in court, when she was mad and usually yelling the the court system and always defending herself.
So today, sitting at this table that was very small in a very small room, there was only Jamie and I, the mediator and her birth mom in the room, by conference call was the lawyer that speaks on Peanuts behalf and a supervisor also who was on by conference call.
I was not sure what to expect from mom, thought she would come in mad, but I just prayed the whole time as we sat waiting for her to come into the room, my prayer "Dear Heavenly Father, please give me the words and wisdom to speak, please Lord meet us here in this room , I give you my anxiety and worries right now, please let me be you right now, hide us behind your cross, let us love on this women as you do, break my heart Lord for what breaks yours, all of this for your Glory, Amen."
So we started the meeting with the 2 ladies on the phone telling the history of the Peanuts birth-mom , how she has done nothing that the courts have asked.
We said nothing, and mom was not angry, she seemed almost embarrassed.
Then we all began to talk about Peanuts future, the mediator asked her mom, what she wanted for her daughter, she said she wanted nothing but the best for her daughter, and she knows that she does not want her to have the life that she has had. She was afraid that if she had her in her care now, that the cycle would repeat itself and that she would never want that for her daughter. She told everyone in the room that she was thankful for Jamie and I, that she had nothing against us, she said she knows there is bad foster parents out there that do not care about the foster kids, and she can tell that we love her daughter.
Her birth mom asked us what we would say about her if she decided to let us adopt her, what would we say about her mom when she got older and asked , we told her that we would tell her that her mom her mom loved her so much that she did the best thing for her child and gave her up for adoption, knowing that we could give her a better life.
Tears began to roll down her cheeks and then mine as my heart broke for her, she was realizing this was the better choice, God was letting me feel what she was feeling, at first it was failure as a mother and now it was courage to do the right thing.
She said I don't know this family well, only seen them at the court hearings, but I can tell they will take care of her, then she looked deep into my eyes and asked, "please you won't let anything bad happen to her, will you?"
I told her that we already loved her as our own and I would protect her as best as I could.
The mediator at that time, asked her mom "are you saying that you would like to let them adopt her?" She began to cry and said "yes"
So of course I began to cry and then the mediator began to cry, she told us she was breaking all the rules letting herself cry too, birth mom had to excuse herself from the room for a moment to compose herself, Jamie and I just sat in the room in silence except for a few sniffles for the tears that would not stop coming.
This lady who for 16 months who has fought the system the whole way, is now willing to let us adopt her daughter, only God, only God!!!!
We all came back into the room the mediator asked how we could keep in contact, we said we would send photos and letters to her address. Mom agreed to that also.
We started to end the meeting and the mediator asked if we all had anything in closing to say, Jamie just looked at the birth mom and said thank you, I dug in my purse after the Lord told me to give her a photo of Peanut. I handed it to her, told her to keep this picture as encouragement to get clean, maybe the photo could be her inspiration.
She starred at it for a long time while crying.
I told her that I was proud of the choice she was making and that she was courageous, not a failure for making the choice she did today.
She looked at the mediator and said, if it's ok with the foster mom and you , can I hug her?
She replied yes and I almost ran to her with my arms open, just as Jesus would have, we hugged so tight as we both sobbed, for one mother letting go of her daughter and the other embracing her.
As we hugged I told her to focus on today, for tomorrow has enough troubles of it's own.
She said thank you, then as we we finished the hug, she said" you promise to take care of her?" I said "I promise"

God's ways are better than ours, his thoughts are better than our own.
I think sometimes God only gives us a glimpse of what he sees because, we could not handle this kind of grace all the time, we are human. He wants us to come to him in all circumstances, and not just the big stuff, but little too.

Won't you give God your "stuff?" he wants to mold into a beautiful tapestry."he promises' ;)"
Love you all,
Shelley